Keeping My Eyes on Him

My deeply rooted theological studies and degree come in the form of teaching children’s Bible study. I am always in awe, when the children’s lesson I teach on Sunday lines up to spiritual perfection with the lesson I teach to Ladies on the following Wednesday night. Not planned by flesh, but designed by God to line up two different curriculums in the same week to disciple both children and women within our church. It never ceases to amaze or excite me. But you know what amazes me even more? When the lesson I taught to my church children ends up being perfectly timed to the message my heart needed so desperately.  Such is the case each and every week.

The 14th chapter of Matthew is where you will find the miracle of Jesus feeding over 5,000 men plus women and children from the small basket of fish and loaves that one little boy chose to share. So many at this point in Jesus’s ministry wanted to hear what He had to say. So many hoped to catch a glimpse of one of His miracles being performed. When Jesus finished teaching this crowd, He had the disciples get into the boat ahead of Him. At this time, Jesus went up onto the top of a mountainside by himself to pray (Matthew 14:23). He needed that time with the Father alone. And we do too.

Eventually, Jesus made His way back to the disciples. The boat had gone a considerable distance into the water. Waves and wind enveloping all around. And Jesus walked on the water towards the boat. When the disciples caught sight, they were terrified thinking it was a ghost.

“But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” “Lord if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.” “Come,” He said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” Matthew 14:27-31

I love that Peter so desperately wanted to get to Jesus. I love that he was willing to go when Jesus called him. And for a little while, Peter was so focused on Jesus that he was able to do the unthinkable. Peter walked on water. But the flesh soon took over that beautiful moment. Peter’s focus on Jesus diminished to the reality of what loomed around him. Deep dark waters and roaring wind… and Peter began to sink.

There are days in my life that I am so focused on Jesus and His calling that the wind and waves of life fail in comparison to the beauty of following His divine purpose that he set for my life. And then there are days that my flesh takes over and I see every obstacle before me. My feet fail and I sink. Where once my faith was strong and my eyes focused on Him, doubt washes over me like the strongest of waves. How Lord? How do I continue to serve faithfully without hurt, rejection, failure, insecurity…

When Jesus called Peter out upon the water, He knew his feet and faith would eventually fail. Yet, He called Peter anyway.

When Jesus calls, I will continue to go. I know that my focus on Him at times will be beautiful and strong. And I know I will allow distractions to cause me to momentarily sink and lose sight of Him.

That’s when I will cry out for Him to save me. And I know He will. His hand ever present waiting for me to grab hold.

“Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders, let me walk upon the waters wherever You would call me. ” Hillsong “Oceans”